WANTING AND PREFERRING TO STAY HAPPY

I think people with too much emotional baggages is bad for me. I'm saying this NOT because I don't like them, NOT because I don't have friends who are baggage-free and NOT because I don't ever want to have friends who are tied up emotionally. I'm just saying this for the simple fact that I am very sensitive and easily affected. And, I was one those overly emotional people ( I stress on the overly because too much of a thing is always bad) and I relied too much on other people to make me happy. I fed on their compliments, on their reassurances, on their appreciation of me. But later on, I wanted to be more healthy emotionally. I read self-help books, I taught myself to toughen up and I made myself less vulnerable. I became this when I met Ruther. He taught me to be strong emotionally and to be less pessimistic and to view the world as it was meant to be: with hope and love and anticipation. (Thanks sweetie!)

There was a time in my life when I was surrounded by emotionally-baggaged friends (3 of them, actually). I think friends usually like to pour their hearts out to me because I am always available to listen. That took its toll on me. I became depressed, negative and easily tired. Then, after reading an article on emotional vampires, I realized that I was unwittingly vampirized by my overly emotional friends. But of course, I never held it out against them. I just realized that I needed to surround myself with more positivism to repel the negative. So, knowing this, I tried to change my friends' outlook in life instead of just lending an ear to them, I tried to make them believe in themselves more rather than just giving them a shoulder to cry on, and then I tried to teach them positivism based on my own experiences. It was not an easy thing to do but later on, I became less tired and depressed and my negativity disappeared.

It was not easy; this realization that I was once an emotional vampire to my friends. But now that I am aware of this, I just want to influence my friends with happy thoughts and positive vibes. Of course, there will always be a time when I will have down days and bad days and rant days. But unlike before, I take those in stride now. No more endless self-pity and depression. (Maybe an hour or two will suffice. =D) And I am no longer in fear of friends who could overwhelm me with their emotional baggages. I am now emotionally stronger and wiser. So yes, I might still be affected by overly emotional friends, but that does not mean I don't love them, that I'm not willing to hear them out, or that I'm not willing to help them.