MORE PATIENCE FOR ME... AND HELP PLEASE...

A few days ago my hair fell to the middle of my back. Not anymore. I asked (read: forced) Ruther to cut my hair last Saturday after getting impatient with my long tresses. I would have wanted a professional cut and as much as I would love having this first experience, salon services are expensive in Japan and I would really rather we save the money for Nikki's birthday bonanza rather than on a haircut for myself. So deciding on that, I supposed that it was all right for Ruther to trim my hair. He was really nervous but there was no changing my mind. I wanted a short 'do and I wanted it ASAP. (Don't ask me why but if I didn't get my haircut immediately then I would have chopped my hair off myself.) Anyway, it took some time but I am quite happy with my new haircut. My hair now falls above my shoulders and my head feels really light and I am already thinking of all the shampoo I would be saving now that I have less hair. I am still thinking of getting the haircut I want later on (perhaps in Manila) but for now, I am happy with the change.

(The photos will come soon, don't worry.)

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We went to Ueno today after church. We had fun at Ueno Park and I loved the photos we took of the autumn leaves and colorful sights and food stalls and the family fun, of course. It was really wonderful getting immersed in the culture. Inside Ueno Park is a zoo but we didn't go in anymore since we were just at Nogeyama Zoo a few days before. It was a short stroll but it was still fun and hopefully we sould get to see even more beautiful places - before it turns icy cold, that is.

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I am usually a very patient and tolerant person. I believe myself to be pretty understanding of people from different walks of life and I always try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt before jumping to conclusions about a person's personality. I have grown and matured mentally and emotionally, knowing different kinds of people, relating to them, interacting with them, learning from them, and after taking the psychology course, I think I have broadened my tolerance for people with (let's just say) some unsavory traits. I could take some of those traits (to a limit): poor hygiene, emotional vampires, extreme neediness, perverts, temperamental people, etc. I would always turn to my psychological thinking and try to find reason behind those traits. More often than not, I see some sense in their actions and words. I would usually think, "I suppose that is why he/she is like that", see the connection and be more understanding of their peculiarities.

But lately, my tolerance for a certain person has really stretched me to my limit. Not only is she obnoxious, but she is spoiled, self-righteous, overbearing and a first class brat. Yes, you could even say she's a B****. You would have to forgive me for saying that but she is really all this (and probably more). Honest. I'm not exaggerating. Several weeks now I have "studied her case" in my head. I have tried to look at her personality from all angles, tried to piece together her background just to make some sense of her really ugly traits, even tried looking for some redeeming qualities in her, but I just can't see how all these unsavory traits could end up in one person and I cannot see how I can tolerate her uppish attidute any longer. This is really not the kind of person I would want my boys to emulate. No way.

The definition of a snob is:

1. One who tends to patronize, rebuff, or ignore people regarded as social inferiors and imitate, admire, or seek association with people regarded as social superiors.
2. One who affects an offensive air of self-satisfied superiority in matters of taste or intellect.

This is exactly who she is. You try to start a conversation with her and it ends up with a topic about her. She talks about Nikki or Ethan as a conversation opener and pretty soon it's something about her or her family. She compliments you about something and when you talk about yourself, she cuts you off and starts talking about something concerning her. You try to be nice (with your entire being, you try to be oh-so-nice) but it's hard to resist gritting your teeth or pulling your hair from the roots when all she talks about is her, herself, Her Highness, her family, her dogs, her hair, her food, her clothes, her life and all you could do is smile and nod. I am not being biased here. I know of other people who have complained about her and really, how can they not? After looking at her "case" for weeks now, I still find it SO hard to be friendly and nice when she's all that I mentioned above (and probably more). Still, I know I am not a mean person. I know I should always give people second chances. But deep inside, I feel that this person can no longer change who she is. She is the kind of person who could find no fault in herself. Being spoiled all her life, she feels as though she could get away with anything. She feels that people should pay attention to her when she is around. She can't even talk softly for crying out loud. Yup, it's all, "I, me, mine". See how hard it is to love or like a person like that?

As God is my witness I have tried, really tried to like her. But it is just so freaking hard!!! I just feel so emotionally tired after spending time with her. I feel as though all my energies were spent exuding a positive front to counteract all her negative acts/words. Sigh. Am I really mean? Do I really have horse-blinders on when it comes to this particular person? Trust me, in my whole life I have never, ever encountered a person like her. She just really makes me angry, sad, pissed, irritated, pitiful (for her, not for myself) all in one. And that's a lot to take in a single moment with her. Sigh.

What would you do if you were in my shoes?