CHANGES

The nights have definitely become a whole lot cooler. Previously, I would sometimes wake up in the early morning and be uncomfortably warm so I would always have the AC remote beside me to turn the air conditioning back on. But last night was deliciously cool. It kind of reminded me of those chilly December mornings when my siblings and I had to prepare for school and of course, of Noche Buena and Misa de Gallo also. I dunno but I just can't stop thinking of Christmas. Anyway, I was able to convince the boys to sleep in the loft last night and fortunately, Ethan complied. I was at first guessing that he would come down in the middle of the night and insert himself between Ruther and me but he slept soundly through the night. This morning though, he was curled up into a ball so I covered him up with a blanket. Speaking of blankets, I usually sleep with one but in the morning someone steals it! Of course it's Ruther. I tease him about it because he always says I feel cold easily but this morning, he was under my blanket as well! Haha! Anyway, I suppose when the nights get a lot more chillier, we would need a bigger blanket.

.....

There's just so many things I love about Japan that sometimes, I get so overwhelmed and don't know which one to focus on and sometimes, I just feel like I can't decide on which particular topic to write about. This would be my 8th month living here (in total) and I just love it more and more. I am less intimidated by the train stations now and am more comfortable commuting. I find talking to people enjoyable and always a fun experience despite my very limited Nihongo. It's always interesting to find things out on my own and learning along the way. In a country where you hardly understand the language, mistakes and misunderstandings are often common but I find these things help me grow more and help me appreciate the culture. In the Philippines, I would always be terrified of making mistakes. I have a somewhat obsessive-compulsive nature and I would always worry about being unprepared or about making mistakes or saying something nonsensical when I interact with people. I just don't want to look well, I want to say obtuse but perhaps stupid gives you a clearer idea. I guess being a sensitive person makes me wary of criticisms and coming across as someone stupid is the least impression I want to give someone, especially to a stranger. But here in Japan, I don't have to worry about that. Well, I did before but I find that this country is helping me to grow as a person and to just welcome mistakes as a part of learning. I no longer freeze up when someone talks to me in Nihongo. I instead try to read the meaning behind the words and if in the end we still can't understand each other, I could leave that coversation with a smile and not worry and obsess about it. Most of the time though, I figure things out (it just takes a bit of time) so that's a good thing I suppose. Anyway, I really don't want my boys to be like me, afraid of making mistakes, afraid to grow as a person, wary of other people's criticisms. Hopefully, they won't and instead of being afraid of life, they will embrace it, just as I am doing right now.